Growing facial hair can be intimidating. You’re constantly inspecting yourself in the mirror, stroking here, tweaking there, and basking in the glow of numerous compliments from friends and family who have never seen you look so darn good. Growing facial hair for charity is as especially good idea so this year we’re holding the hands of a few daring souls as they take on their first Movember. Today, it’s the first in a four-part series by 22 year-old student Christopher Sharpe as he embarks upon his mojourney to hairy glory.
Rise from the sink and there you are, smooth as an Action Man and twice as shiny. First rule of Movember: everyone starts clean shaven. No matter how fantastic your facial foliage, grandiose your goatee, or magnificent your moustache, consider it gone. You stand or fall based on what your follicles can conjure in 30 days.
On that note, facial hair has never been my strong suit. Bucket-loads of it on top – a hesitant revisit of my MySpace recently, revealed that my GHD-driven emo phase had unfortunately not been a fever dream, but was instead rather painstakingly well-documented – yet my lipholstery is patchier than Russell Brand’s revolutionary rhetoric.
It’s with an ounce of trepidation then, that I embark on my very first Movember. First, there’s the aesthetics involved. It’s not even a matter of how I’m going to look necessarily, as how that look is going to be perceived. Moustaches carry a burden of history that’s not to be taken lightly. There’s a great moral ambiguity amongst those bristles, and the correlation between dictators* and terrible moustaches in particular hangs over me. So whilst Nietzsche and Selleck’s masterpieces are undoubtedly out of my league, if I end up looking like Pinochet I won’t be a happy bunny.
Then there’s the physical impact. Certainly by the mid-stages it’s going to be as if I’ve attained an anonymous lodger via Gumtree, one who soon turns out to have a penchant for hoarding food, hand-knitted jumpers and excessively lingering cuddles. Let’s call him Monty. The itchy bastard.
Fears and whinging aside mind, I’m actually very excited. Raising awareness about and money for men’s health can never be a bad thing. Hell, Movember could well be immensely self-fulfilling, an opportunity for every Mo Bro to take, as a wise man once said: “a vacation from ourselves”.
If you’re feeling generous, give me a click: mobro.co/mopher
*Replace dictators with 70s porn stars as you wish. [This is actually a brilliant UN proposal, give me a call Kofi.]
Give your pennies to Christopher’s budding tache here